- Ronfar's Escape Quote, Lunar 2: Eternal Blue Complete
I, the god-like entity, Arekusu Ikari am property of myself.
Sycia Iora is owned and managed by herself. =P
Evil Shingo is a 'tard. Nuff said.
Edgey/Testament/whatever is too scary for anyone to claim.
Kula^Diamond won't be reading this for a few more weeks anyway. =P
King of Fighters, Art of Fighting, Fatal Fury and all related characters are property SNK.
Mystery Science Theater and all related characters are property of Best Brains Inc.
All other characters and themes are property of their respective owners.
This is a lemon and contains material not suited for younger viewers but if you happen to be a child prodigy or just don't care. Go ahead and read. I only put this here because I sorta have to but in the long run, I don't give two shits what this'll do to you. =P
In the not so distant future,
Somewhere in time and space.
Ikari, Edgey and their other pals,
Were caught in a pretty bad plan.
Tormented by Evans and Orochi Yamazaki too.
Two people on a power trip.
In their apartment below,
they set their goals real high.
Just to piss Ikari and the other guys!
(Ikari: Je...sus CHRIIIIIIIST!)
[Evans and Yamazaki singing]
We'll send them bad fanfics,
the worst we can find. (La la la)
And they have to sit and watch them all,
While we screw up their already fucked up minds. (La la la)
Now keep in mind that Ikari can't control,
We the fanfics begin or end. (La la la)
He'll just have to take it all,
With the help of the other guys!
(THE List boss! The List!)
Arekusu Ikari! (Bare Knuckle!!)
Edgey! (Pook pook pook!)
Evil Shingoooo! (YAKING!!!)
Sycia! (Beefu Arrow~!)
Batsuuuu POWAH!!! (W00t!)
If you're wondering how they eat and breathe,
And other pointless facts,
Just remind yourself 'It's just some Courier New text,
I should really just relax!'
For FORUM FANATIC THEATER 8475!!! (BWANG!!!)
[Church of Evans, the garden]
Ikari: This is just a BIT too gay for my image so can we like...put me somewhere else?
[Church of Evans, the gay bar]
Ikari: Har har. Try again buddy.
[Church of Evans, near the theater]
Ikari: Way to go. You actually did it!
Ikari: S'okay. Now we just need the rest of the cast.
Ikari: *marking off a checklist* That's one.
Edgey: *evil Kodachi laugh*
Ikari: *ears now bleeding* Two...
Proto: On time delivery! No seppuku! $39.95 gaijin dog!
Ikari: Thr-...hey...wait a tick. Hand over the food ninja boy or I'll seppuku you!
Arekusu proceeds to chase Proto around.
Batsu: We're still missing three people!
Shingo: Ph34r the EBIL ONE!
Arekusu runs back on-screen, flailing his arms.
Ikari: This intro sucks! Try again!
Alex: Let me to lazy ya pansy.
Ikari: You will give BOOMBA NOW!!
[Church of Evans, the theater]
Arekusu is lodging in one of the many chairs, decked out in Zero's armor when Sycia runs in and tackles him off the chair.
Sycia: Evans wants to see us! Noooooooow~!
Ikari: But I'm tired...
Sycia: Evans say you either speak with him or else... *WHAM!*
Sycia: ^_^ I thought kneeing you in the nutz would get your attention.
Sycia then drags her little brother out and to the control room and turns on the nearest monitor, revealing a rather pissed off Evans and in the background, Orochi Yamazaki.
Evans (Ricky): Ikari, you got some splainin' to do!
Ikari: But I didn't do anything!
Evans: You've inspired the other forums members to become mindless MSTing soldiers for your own sick purposes! (Damn, I wish I'd thought of it first...)
Ikari: It was Edgey's idea! Torture her!
Evans: That's not the point. The point is, you were the first one to ever put an MSTing in the forums so you are the first to suffer!
Arekusu notices Yamazaki's presence for the first time.
Ikari: What's Yamazaki doing there with you?
Evans: Are you blind?! Every evil guy in an MSTing needs a sidekick!
Yamazaki: And the pay is good.
Evans: Ahem...your piece of Hell today is a delightful Final Fantasy Tactics lemon of horrid proportions! The others will be joining you soon.
Yamazaki: Sycia, Batsu Power, the tard, Edgey and Kula^Diamond.
Sycia: Wait...why me? I haven't MSTed!
Evans: You've been in a lot of MSTings though so you WILL SUFFER! Yamazaki! Send them the trash! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
Yamazaki: I have to actually do work? I get more money for that... *WHOOSH!*
The monitor shuts off and the two siblings reluctantly return to the theater. Upon their arrival, the other previously mentioned people are already there, chained to the theater chairs.
Edgey: Way to go Ikari! >_<
Kula: You are SO dead after this big brother...
Batsu: You got any bright ideas on what to say Ikari?
Ikari: Nothing besides 'Enjoy the torment'.
[Seating Chart (L to R): Edgey, Shingo, Kula, Batsu, Sycia and Ikari]
>Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters her... blah, blah, blah… this
>is entirely fictional… blah, blah, blah…this things NEVER really happened
>in the game… blah, blah, blah… this is intended for adults only (but if
>you’re like I used to be when I was underage you wont really care about
>that and probably wont even read this.).
Sycia: *looking at Shingo and K^D* Ahem!
Kula: We'd leave if we could, believe me.
Shingo: What about Arekusu, he's underage too!
Ikari: That's not the point.
>Final Fantasy Tactics
Shingo: Not much of a change.
*collective groans all around*
>Delita was lying on the ground bleeding after his wife Princess Ovelia had
>just stabbed him, he knew that he was dying, the corpse of Ovelia was
Edgey: In Limbo?
Batsu: In Purgatory?
Ikari: The cream in the middle of the Oreo?
Sycia: *drooling* The meat on the sandwich?
Kula: The tootsie roll center of the tootsie pop?
Shingo: The girl in the middle of the orgy? *Sycia and Kula promptly smack him*
>in front of him after he had killed her. He tried to stand but was unable
>to do it,
All: You can't do it!
>he had already lost too much blood. He barely managed to cough up a fe w
>words mixed with blood, before exhaling his final breath.
Batsu (Delita): Rose...bud...
>Delita: Why Ovelia? Why did you do this?
Edgey (Ovelia): You were a bad lay Needle Dick!
Ikari (Delita): My secret! Nooooooooo!!
>After that Delita’s eyes closed and he slumped in the ground his final
>thoughts been that he didn’t what to die like that.
Kula: Delita wanted to die a hero's death. To be flung from a bridge and into the abyss!
>Delita: I wont die… I want to live, I want to get revenge on the world
>that did this to me.
Shingo (The World): It was the People's Choice!
>And finally with that final thought he died, but he didn’t lose
>consciousness, actually he could see everything and even felt stronger that
Ikari (Gill): RESURRECTION!
Sycia: There goes his Super Arts meter!
>Delita: What is going on? I thought that I had died, then why…
>Suddenly everything went black and he heard a voice that was coming from
>everywhere at the same time.
Sycia: New FFT lemons in SURROUND SOUND!
>?: Do you wish to live? Do you wish to bring to the this world the same
>sadness and despair that it has brought to you?
>Delita: Who are you?
Edgey: I AM IRON MAN.
>?: I am Saint Ajoria.
>Delita: What? But you were destroyed by Ramza.
>Saint Ajoria: I cannot be destroyed, I am eternal. He merely succeeded in
>stopping me temporarily. But that is of no consequence I ask you again do
Kula: Like cheese?
Ikari: *scream of terror* Dairy products!
>you wish to live and get revenge on the world?
>Saint Ajoria: I see, so you don’t desire the power to avenge yourself, then
Shingo (Delita): Let me think abo-ARGH! *dies*
>Delita continued without answering he did wish to live he wanted to take
>revenge on the world but he didn’t want to sacrifice his soul to Saint
Sycia: Peter! Damn Christianity! Damn it to Hell and back! REH!
Ikari: Amen sistah!
>Ajoria to attain this purpose.
>Saint Ajoria: Maybe this will convince you Delita.
Edgey (Ajora): Witness now the full pale glory of the holy SHABADOOS!
Batsu, Ikari and Shingo: *stare at the screen with hope in their eyes*
Sycia and Kula: Hentaaaai~! *the three women smack the males*
>After saying this a female figure appeared before Delita bue he couldn’t
>see very well who it was, but the darkness diminished a bi
Batsu (Solid Snake): They called him Vamp because he was bisexual.
Shingo (Raiden): That's fucked up man.
>and allowed to see who it was, and when he realized who it was he took a
Sycia: Wasn't he lying down a minute ago?
Ikari: Sister dearest, remove the thoughts of continuity from your head when watching a lemon. It will only bring you great pain.
>Delita: No, it cant be…
Kula (Filia): This can't be!
Shingo (Zelgadis): This can't be!
Sycia (Lina): This can't be!
Batsu (Gourry): This can't be!
Edgey (Amelia): This can't be!
Ikari: Ladies and gentlemen, the most over-used line in the Slayers series.
>The woman reached out to him and caressed his cheek he grabbed her hand
>with tears flowing from his eyes.
Shingo (Booster): What is this? Water coming from your eyes? ....It tastes salty.
>Delita: Teta, Teta is it really you?
Edgey (Teta): Nope! It's really your second cousin Jamie!
Ikari (Delita): D'oh!
>Teta: Yes, brother. Its me.
>She also broke down crying and throw herself at his arms, burying her face
>in his chest and embracing him at the same time a gesture that he answered
>caressing her hair at the same time.
All: *dumb look* What?
>Teta: Oh brother, I’ve missed you so much.
>Delita: Teta, oh Teta I cant believe that this is really happening that I
>have you in my arms again.
Kula (Teta): Stop groping my ass you perv!
>Teta: Brother I suffered so much, I was all alone, I cried an cried but no
>one would answer me.
Sycia (Teta): All I would get is that monotone but somehow attractive operator telling me the party was not answering!
>As they continued to embrace and to say how much they had missed each other
>Sain Ajoria voice resounded again.
Zyzyfer (Ajora): HAIL EL GIMPO.
>Saint Ajoria: This is what you can have if you decide to serve me Delita,
>you can have back our sister and… lover.
All: *pause* ...What?
Kula: I take back my previous comment.
>Delita shuddered as he heard this, for it was truth that he and Teta had
>been lovers in the past when they both were still young and alive they had
>fall in love, a love that was
Batsu: And still is...
>forbidden because they were brother and sister, but they had never care
>they had tried to keep it secret.
Edgey: This sounds like a Yushiro 'fic somehow.
Shingo: Haven't seen one 'Delita-kun', 'Ajora-sama' or 'Teta-chan' yet.
>Delita: How do you know that ? We never let anyone know.
>Saint Ajoria: Do you think that there is anything that I don’t know? >Foolish human, I am a god I know everything
Sycia: I know not the use of proper Engrish because I am the |337 G0d byatch!
>now answer me Delita do you wish to let your sister die again and join her
>in hell or do you want the power to give life back to her and to return to
>the world and make it repent for their sins?
Ikari: This is more like a Neon Genesis Evangelion fanfic but alas...no Ayanami...
Alarm: FANBOY ALERT!
>Delita remained silent once more but he the took one look at Teta and saw
>the fear in her eyes at the thought of been forced back to death, and he
>made his decision.
Shingo: DIE BITCH DIE!!
>Delita: I accept, I will become your servant if you allow me and my sister
>to live again.
>Saint Ajoria: I can only give life back to you, but once you live again
>you’ll be able to revive her yourself.
Alex: Lies! I tried that in the game but it didn't work!
>Once again Delita hesitated at the step he was about to take but he hold
Batsu: His twin sister.
>tight against himself as he spoke again.
>Delita: Then so be it.
>Saint Ajoria: The become one with me and embrace the power and the
Kula: And so Delita did embrace the darkness until...
Ikari (Delita): Is that a tentacle I just felt? AIEEEEEEEEEEE!
>After that all the darkness around him seemed to focus on him, generating a
>huge explosion all around him and then he opened his eyes and realized he
>was back in the ruins where he had “died”,
Shingo: *deep* YOU DIED.
>but not only did this not surprise him he also had an evil grin on his face
>and a eerie glow on his eyes.
Batsu (Cloud): It's the mark of SOLDIER.
>He saw Ovelia corpse and smirked, then he approached her knelt down before
>her and kissed her full on the lips,
Edgey (Delita): Mmm...zombie lips.
>as he did this as he did this a dark aura began to emit from his body and >to cover Ovelia’s after a short time she opened her eyes and once she
>realized who it was kissing her quickly backed away from him.
Sycia (Ovelia): Get thee hence vile necrophiliac!
>Ovelia: What is going on? I thought that I had
>Delita: Killed me? Well you DID.
>Ovelia: Then how?
Ikari (Delita): It's called Life 3, Auto Raise, Angel Ring etc. etc.
>Delita: After you killed me I made a pact with Saint Ajoria and he brought
>me back to life, and now thanks to him I am a GOD.
Kula: ...He? What? Eh? Durr?
>Delita saw the despair in her eyes and that made him feel good knowing that
>he now possessed the power to do anything he desired, but it also elicited
>another feeling in him, lust.
Batsu: All humans feel that, not just gods.
>Delita: That’s not all, don’t you remember that I killed you too? Why do
>you think that I brought you back to life?
Edgey (Ovelia): I don't want to play with your pencil anymore! >_<
>Ovelia began to feel to feel even more afraid now, she couldn’t believe
>that Saint Ajoria was still alive or that he had given Delita powers, but
>she knew that it was true, and the look on Delitas eyes as well as the
>memory of him killing her made her shudder in fear.
Sycia: His boner just decayed and fell off...*all the guys whimper and cross their legs*
>Ovelia: W… what do you mean?
>Delita delighted in her fear and an even more twisted smile crossed his
Shingo: Delita's face is like a street or something.
>Delita: You have been chosen to mother my son Ovelia. You are to be the
>mother of Saint Ajoria Himself.
Sycia and Ikari: Children! REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH~! *cue Riot of the Blood sequence here*
>As he said this Ovelia did a double take and as realization dawned on her
>she began screaming and tried to run away Delita didn’t bother to try to
>stop her he knew that he could reach her whenever he desired and that there
>was nothing she could to stop him.
Kula: Except maybe kill herself again.
>Delita: Run my little Princess I will catchy you when the time is ripe but
>first there is another one that I need to attend to.
Edgey: He's gonna have some deformed children with his sister.
Sycia: *scream of fury*
Ikari: *scream of equal amount of fury*
Kula (Leon): Get down! *throws herself over the back of her seat as does everyone else as Sycia and Ikari slash at the screen like maniacs*
>Delita: I… did it.
Batsu (Yuna): I've become a summoner...
Sycia: Reeeeeeeeh!!! *slashes away the next paragraph*
All but Ikari and Sycia: *singing* Hey baaaaaby! When I think about you I see stars~!
>Ovelia was running through the forest trying to escape from Delita she
>didn’t know where she was going, she only knew that she had to get away
>from him. Away from the evil and most of all away from the fate that Delita
>and Saint Ajoria had decided for her.
Shingo (Delita): You will forever be my pretty secretary named Denise. Now put on those stockings and short skirt NOW!
Kula (Ovelia): Nooooooooooooo!
>She continued to run aimlessly but suddenly the floor disappeared below her
>and she foud herself falling, then she felt crashing against something and
>then sinking in something, and finally she lost consciousness, no one heard
>her scream as she fell to the river and ended unconscious while it carried
>her away probably drowning…
All: Yay! *Ikari and Sycia scream it instead*
>Teta was lying in the ground seemingly unconscious, her face seemed
>peaceful, and her naked breasts heaved up and down regularly with
>her even breathing, clearly proving that she was alive again, after seeing
>her naked body Delita felt another stir of lust within him but there was
Batsu: No way in hell we were going to sit here and watch it. Ikari, Sycia, sic it. *both insane riffers lunge at the screen and hack at it mercilessly*
>Delita: Teta, you’re alive, youre really alive again.
>Teta: Yes brother and its all thanks to you.
Kula (Teta): Good brother, no incest for you!
>Despise his happiness at having his sister back with him Delita felt the
>stirring of hunger within him again, he had lost too much energy and he
>needed to recover it.
Shingo: Try a toilet! *throws a toilet that totally misses the screen and clocks Ikari over the head, knocking him out* Oops...
Edgey: He's gonna kill you when he wakes up.
>Delita: Teta, I… I need…
>Delita: I see that you are enjoying this very much aren’t you Teta?
Kula: Sycia! I'll give you a big piece of beef if you do a better job!
Shingo: Is that a buzzsaw I hear?
Batsu: Nah, just Sycia tearing up the screen.
>Teta: I want you NOW!
Edgey: Too bad! I'm spoken for!
Ikari: *groggily* Hands don't count Edgey...
Edgey: Can it Pyroboy! *throws Shingo at him, knocking both of them out*
>Delita smiled and grabbed her kissing her again as they kissed clothes
>began to materialize around Teta. When they broke the kiss Teta took a time
>to appreciate her new clothes and smiled her approval.
Kula (Teta): Aww...a Dominatrix outfit, how sweet of you!
Batsu (Delita): It used to be mine!
>Teta: Well then, Brother what do we do now?
>Delita’s expression changed from a calm and contempt one to one of feral
>Delita: Now we hunt.
Edgey (Delita): Death by BOOMBA!
Batsu (Animal): AIEEEEEEEEEE!!
>To Be Continued…
All: O_O Nooooooooooooo!!
>Final Notes: Well this is my second lemon and I hope that im getting
*everyone boos and hisses*
>I also hope that you had a good time reading it, I will probably continue
>to write this one if you send feedback, As usual C&C are welcome, and I
>will try to answer all the mails that I receive probably not on the same
>day but I’ll try to do it anyway.
Kula: Do us a favor and avoid your computer, paper and writing utensils! *drags Shingo and Ikari out of the theater*
Edgey and Batsu follow with a fishing pole with a big slab of beef attached to the end of it, luring Sycia with them.
[Outside the Theater]
Sycia is tearing apart the beef happily and the others are all sitting in front of the TV, with the exception of Ikari, who's still out like a light.
Batsu: You cheater! You can't just sit there with Ness all day!
Shingo: Can too! Neener neener neeeeener... *WHAM!* You bastard! You killed Ness!
Edgey: Eat hot laser 'tard! OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!
Kula: *shudders* Can you not laugh like that...?
Evans looks on in fury as his attempt to torment the MSTers has failed. Yamazaki is counting his money, several piles already nearby.
Yamazaki: One hundred more dollars Evans...
Evans: Grrrr! Dammit! Push the button and I'll double it! *FWOOOOOSH!*
Perhaps that was the most important part
>After that Delita’s eyes closed and he slumped in the ground his final
>thoughts been that he didn’t what to die like that.
[Season One MSTings]
Episode 001: Zelgadiss the Rapper - Prologue
Episode 002: The Anime Laws
Episode 003: Zelgadiss the Rapper - I need to be a hero
Episode 004: Time Flies
Episode 005: Zelgadiss the Rapper - You guys can sit in the back
[Season Two MSTings]
Episode 006: Little Boys with Bad Intent
Episode 007: Pure Sex
Episode 008: A Poker Game
Episode 009: Ranma ½: Akane's Twin - Who Am I?
Episode 010: Resident Evil: Code Veronica - Trapped In A Plane
Episode 011: Resident Evil 3: Nemesis - Trapped In The Basement
Episode 012: Untitled Resident Evil 2 Lemon
[Season Three MSTings]
Episode 013: Evil CS/OC/AWoW: Dark Fire
Episode 014: FFT: Delita's Corruption
[Phantasy Star Online Intruders]
Episode 001: Kyle's Saga (Part 1): Meeting A New Allies...
Episode 002: By the Lake
Episode 001a: Kyle's Saga (Part 2): Meeting A New Allies...
[Shameless Plug Alert]
One year old, one less year younger.
Crowded Street, Advanced